In many synagogues throughout the world, the words Da Lifnei Mi Atah Omed appear over the ark -- KNOW BEFORE WHOM YOU STAND.
Some of you are aware of my ongoing PRAY AND MEAN IT activities -- unpacking the words of our prayers paragraph by paragraph. I've been at it one way or another for over 10 years -- and it's likely to occupy some of my time and energy after my retirement. In an expansion of a corner of that activity, I have started recording myself praying the daily service -- not all the time -- just making some basic recordings. I am always conscious of whether or not I'm really thinking about the words I'm praying as they "go by" -- but "when the little light is on" -- kal vachomer -- all the more so.
I take pride in being mindful of these composed words -- and I believe it helps me to be more mindful of the words I actually SAY to people.
I'm nowhere near perfect. I still have to apologize and re-word things too much of the time.
But when I see and hear some of the voices in the public square today, I am growing increasingly aware that many people have no sense that they have responsibility for their words at all. This isn't so surprising when words appear on screens and news feeds and might not even get printed out and here comes the next news cycle.
But as your mother used to tell you -- words and actions have consequences.
A couple of people I'd like to call attention to -- in very different contexts and with pretty different implications -- this Tisha B'Av -- Seth Rogen and Prime Minister Netanyahu.
Rogen is the Hollywood mogul who used to be just a joker A master of writing and portraying silliness that was really inappropriate and off-color and very irritating but somehow made you sympathetic more than not, he's had enough successes that he's now a full-on big shot -- so that what he says or does matters to thousands of people. His .interview with Marc Maron, another free-speaking I-can-say-any-shit-I-want-to-middle-aged Jewish amuser, has sparked lots of reaction.
On one level -- HEY GREAT! That's just what Rogen would want. He's got a new movie coming out. Way easier for you to hear about it if people are arguing about stuff he says.
But on another level, those words that he can flippantly offer up along with Maron and hide behind the shield of "I'm just expressing myself -- I'm a comedian, writer, producer, actor -- I don't need to defend myself" are heavier than he's willing to admit.
In the interview, he says that "as a Jewish person, I was fed a huge amount of lies about Israel my entire life.” “You know, they never tell you that, 'Oh, by the way, there were people there. They make it seem like it was just sitting there – oh the f***ing door’s open!”
This relates to one of the brilliant slogans coined about the magnetism of Jews and the Land of Israel for each other -- A Land With a People for A People Without A Land.
The phrase pre-dates much Zionist thought but was promoted by early Zionist Israel Zangwill -- and you'll still hear it in use today occasionally -- most often in right-wing descriptions of why "Judea and Samaria" should be part of the "eternal homeland of the Jewish people."
For my part (getting back to daily prayers), I say every day that God has promised to us the land of the Canaanites, Hittites, Amorites, Perizites, Jebusites and Girgashites. I'm quite certain that many others who recite this prayer (just before we recount the liberation from Egypt, something we do multiple times each day) read it as telling us that the land belongs to us -- God said it -- that settles it -- etc. For me, it's way more complicated. I know that the Torah and Prophets spare no words in telling us that we need to wipe out all evidence of those folks -- and that when we fail to do so, we will ensnare ourselves and suffer grievously. So it's a daily reminder that, although I DO believe that there's an amazing tie between my people and this land (and it's WHERE I AM RIGHT NOW!!!) I recognize that my people have never had an exclusive claim to that land. Nor has anyone else. So we’re GOING TO NEED TO WORK ON THAT. So when I recite this passage every day, it’s a reminder that I need to support negotiations with other people who think the land belongs to them.
Which brings us back to Seth Rogen. Seth – you had a pretty intense Zionist education. Your parents were radical social Zionists. You went to Young Judaea programs – which are among the best. Are you saying that at no time in your adolescence someone brought into discussion the complicating facts of other people who are here? This is the claim of groups like If Not Now, the young adults who have decamped to the left of the circles in which I run – who claim that they were lied to about the truth of Israel and Palestine.
As someone who was an occasional part-time staffer at Ramah Wisconsin, I understand pretty deeply the challenge of how and when to present messages to campers and staff about Israel. You probably don’t have a complicated political history discussion with an 11-year-old – although I have always told the story of how many then-6 year-old daughter, when she beheld the Palestinian neighborhood outside the Old City when we first visited there, DID understand things in ways that too few adults do – “They think it belongs to them. They’re not going anywhere. We think it belongs to us. We’re not going anywhere.” BOOM!
So how do you shape that message to a 14-year-old? A 16-year-old? Your 18-21 year old staffers? These are challenging questions that I saw the Camp wrestling with.
And, though I appreciate that these young people are no longer accepting tired old answers to questions, I mostly see and hear them stomping their feet and blaming the State of Israel and Jews around the world and preparing to destroy what has been built without a clear picture or path to what needs to be built instead.
“Tear it all down” isn’t helpful. “Tear some things down” and “BUILD SOME OTHER THINGS UP” is what is desperately needed.
And back to Rogen: You gotta figure that as a kid he never took anything that anyone said to him seriously. And he’s made quite a good living at that. But some things are important – and you can’t just make jokes about them. Seth, you’re old enough to say “I feel like I was told that it belonged to us – and I don’t think they did enough to help me see a larger picture – and I hope that we can do better in the next generation.” I don’t want to play the Holocaust card here – but the shit he says (you have to read it to come to your own conclusion, and here's a PDF of Allison Kaplan Sommer’s trenchant analysis in Haaretz) -- Sommer on Rogen is just irresponsible.
There are certain truisms that become repeatable and repeated: “Young people are just fed up with Israel and its treatment of the Palestinians.” I’ve been working for years to try and have deeper conversations that enable young people to ask and explore hard questions – against a background in which some more right-wing Jewish groups categorize such people as self-hating or ignorant – when what they are really showing is a real interest in deep questions. When they are denied the opportunity for a grown-up and respectful conversation, they will turn their back on “the whole Israel thing” – which becomes everyone’s loss. And dangerous.
Speaking of irresponsible – we have the Prime Minister of Israel and his Designated Screamer Public Security Minister Amir Ohana – and their minions – yes, minions – not minyans. As dozens of demonstrating middle-aged leftist Israelis have grown into thousands of younger (and older) diverse citizens, Ohana has wondered aloud why the people aren’t treating the demonstrators as badly as they would if they were Chasidim or Ethiopians. And he has said today that the fomenting of violence by the demonstrators is worse than that which preceded the assassination of Itzhak Rabin in 1994 – despite the fact that the only violence occurring (and there is way too much of it) has come from right-wing soccer hooligans who are beating up the demonstrators. And the Prime Minister for his part declares himself and his family under threat of murder – thus stirring the right-wing thuggery into higher gear.
It's really heartbreaking. But part of heartbreak, we understand, is opening our hearts to feel the pain – so I’m going to challenge you – and myself – to be more careful with the things we say. If we are, we’ll be in a better position to hold others accountable.
One of these years on Tisha B’Av, maybe we’ll be able to look back from better times on worse times. L’shanah Haba-ah Birushalayim V’Tel Aviv – v’Hollywood – v’Washington DC – u-wherever-you-are. A time of INCREASING health and DECREASING fear.
